It's not the About the Destination

 So, has anyone heard of slow living? This term is fairly new, but what it means is that we have actually gone against what nature and life used to be. It is living life in a way that counters today's intense busyness. Slowing down doesn't mean we are hardly doing anything. We slow down our thoughts. We slow down our lives and try to lead life the way it was meant to be. Now, this can be very difficult. Slowing down is hard, but that is mainly because most other people are not slowing down. That is probably the hardest concept to grasp. Why bother? 

So many Americans, maybe elsewhere too, live incredibly busy lives. We are like shadow people, now you see me, now you don't. We flit from one thing to the next, causing fatigue and anxiety to ourselves and others. Why do we do this? It has become the norm. It is a sad thing, in my opinion. There is a way to counter it. Yes, slow living. It isn't for everyone maybe, but life can seem more fulfilling when we take the time to do things the hard way. Yes, the hard way. When I was a kid, a teacher once commented to me that I was one of those people who walked two miles when I only needed to walk one. Thing is that back then it was unintentional. I made a mistake by doing more. Truth was that if I'd known I was doing extra, I wouldn't have, especially since it was math homework. I hated math! Now, though, I am constantly walking the extra mile intentionally, on purpose. Seems like a foreign concept to many these days, when common terms you hear are "hacks" and "time savers". People rarely make things "from scratch" either, and when you do, it seems like you always hear, "Must be nice to have that kind of time." Well, guess what, I have the same amount of time in my day as everyone else. I just use it differently. I do have the advantage of being home though, which does avail me to more slow opportunities. When I worked away from home, I still cooked dinner from scratch though. It is not because I like to torture myself, or my family. I do it, in fact, because it is healthier. Fast doesn't mean good when it comes to food. It may not even mean good when you get somewhere fast either. Remember the saying, "It's not about the destination, it's about the journey"? Going slow enables you to see things better, learn more, and enjoy more. Getting there is maybe a goal, but what then? I know, everyone is too busy and the destination is where they want to go to do all the great things. Do we miss things though when we hurry? Do we know we miss them if we never stop to consider this? It's like telling your kids to look at something cool when you're on a road trip. Half the time they're looking down at devices, and by the time they look up to see what you wanted them to see, you're too far past it. They totally missed it, and, sadly, usually don't seem to care that they did.  

I could go on and on with reasons to slow down. I know many people think they can't because they have too many things going on to just stop and do things differently. Will you know you missed out on life if you don't? Probably not. However, taking time to stop and smell the roses, as the saying goes, may be harder than going with the flow. I am reminded of our decision to homeschool when my oldest was entering the first grade. We told everyone in our family what we intended to do. Not one of them had ever considered this option. Most people asked why, like it made no sense to them why we'd want to. We got comments like: "It will be difficult," "I wish I had that kind of patience," and "Must be nice," like we were special and had more resources than others. Some people even seemed offended that we thought we were better than them for choosing to do it. No, we just wanted more for our kids than the schools would give. Plus, it was the realization that we were now the ones who get to decide what our children learned, what was important for them to learn. It was one of the biggest decisions we have ever made as parents. It was taking control, even though we now had the extra expense of education while still paying the school district. It was terrifying in some ways, but was also the most satisfying and deliciously freeing feeling ever. Why? Because we were now the deciders of what information was worthy of learning for our children. We could live our days and our lives the way we chose to. Yes, it's harder. Yes, I NEED more patience. Yes, I don't have as much free time.  It's about the journey. Life will go on and we will perhaps see more. We still do things, sometimes more than we'd like. That's what happens when you have kids. It's a balancing act, doing what you need to do versus doing what you want to do. 

How does one begin to live this way? I'd start small. Choose something you can do that you can walk away from when necessary. Cook a small dish from scratch. Plant a garden, maybe an herb garden, from seed. Take time to breathe, intentionally, for 5 to 10 minutes, without distractions. Slow life down bit by bit. Try this: go for a walk in the woods, or on the beach, without your phone. It's hard, I know. We're expected to be available 24/7 these days, but life will still go on if we're not. It's for your health. It's for your sanity. Even more, it's making life seem that much more important and vital. Vitality, now there's something we can sink our teeth into. Merriam-Webster says that vitality is "the peculiarity distinguishing the living from the nonliving" and also "the capacity to live and develop" with "physical or mental vigor, especially when highly developed". If taking things slower makes you more vital, we should all want to do it, right? It isn't something that will come easily. You'll have to carve out some time more than likely. Slowly, you'll do more and more. It will keep you on your toes! Maybe one day, you'll be doing things the hard way without even realizing it (until someone "points it out" to you perhaps). Life is a journey. Enjoy the trip and take the road less taken. As Theodore Roethke said in "The Waking," "I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow... I learn by going where I have to go." It is life, so learn as you go, however slow you need to do so.